[The change in him is abrupt, almost violent, and his entire upper half shakes with a dry, humorless laugh. He takes a small step backward, eyes still angled to the ground, and curls his arms around his middle.]

"Fortunate". [He immediately segues into a different topic, like the first word wasn't meant to be spoken.] Why didn't you hit me? You could have finally given back a tiny, tiny bit of all the shit I've given you all this time. You could have beaten me down and watched me fall, instead of helping me up like you insist on doing anyway.

[His arms curl tighter around his middle, and he hunches forward, looking up finally. His face is blotched red around his cheeks and eyes, and his eyes themselves have glassed over only just enough to be noticed.]

"Fortunate", am I? When all this time I've wanted to do what you did? I don't even have the ballsack to do that much, though-- I'm a spineless, worthless sack of hateful garbage that can't even die right, and you think I'm fortunate?

[He laughs another short bark of a sound, shaking his head and taking another step backward. ]

Don't envy me, Karamatsu. I get it, now-- you wanted the attention I've gotten all this time, and if I'd known I'd have only held it away from you to spite you. It's the only way I know how to act-- spiteful. Hateful.

[He doesn't seem to realize that now he's started crying, only vaguely registering that his vision was blurred as he tries his damnedest to glare up at Karamatsu.]

It'd serve me right, for you all to get wise and throw it back in my face. So why won't you?