glitterpants | [ LITTLE HADES ] ✖ IC contact

karamatsu girl number 1 here.

[Yeah, he tried calling first, and he got... that message.]

got a couple of commercial gigs for you buddy, let me know if you like the sound of them:

Ghost Rider Ranch - a horse ranch just out of town. They rent and sell horses to the more old fashioned sorta demons. you gotta do the cool cowboy thing, wear a hat, do the john wayne walk and watch out for the horses cause they bite and breathe fire.

Mystery Shampoo - a hair product with some strange side effects. dunno what angle they're looking for. probably something like mad scientist. i guess you'll have to try the shampoo out.

Sexy Poodle Dolls - an escort service where guys and girls dressed up as sexy poodles. don't worry you don't have to screw anybody on camera or anything like that. just dress up as a sexy poodle and promote the place.

still working on getting you auditions and your own show. but doing commercials is a GREAT WAY to built a reputation.

_{[ Lloyd is getting in contact with him at the right time— Karamatsu was starting to get antsy about the entire thing.. also what little money he had was withering away. It's tough living on your own and now having your mommy cook for you every night.
So, when he sees that familiar username message him, he practically leaps out of whatever seat he was sitting in, having to constantly remind himself that yes, this is a reality. It takes him a moment to read everything carefully.

To some people, these commercials would be a downer. To some people, they would be offended to be offered these commercials, but.. ]}

_{[ Karamatsu only sees stars. He only sees himself succeeding— succeeding and leaving his family in the dust.
Especially the first one. He loves, loves, loves cowboys and Western culture. ]}

Ah Mr. Lloyd these are incredible!!! What would i have to do next? Which one should i even start with??

[Atta boy. You don't get far in hell's showbiz by turning your nose up at weird job offers. They're all weird, and these are the nicest Lloyd could find for a fresh actor.]

which one sounds best to you?

Heh. They all sound spectacular its very difficult for me to choose but...
I have always dreamed of wanting an excuse to walk like john wayne.
_{[ like.. in public?? for a show? a play? it's a mystery. ]}

since when do you need an excuse to do anything, man?

[Look at your clothes, buddy. And your... everything else. Why not throw in a John Wayne walk? It wouldn't make you any more outlandish than you already are. But here you go, a totally legitimate excuse. Lloyd sends the ranch address over.]

get your ass over to the ranch and tell them i sent you. they'll give you the outfit and you do the magic.

[It's a small business so the production will be low budget and Karamatsu might need to shovel some shit as part of the gig, but it'll all be worth it. Eventually. That's a fucking promise.]

you'll have a good time. if you get bit or kicked too hard, we got a doctor working with the agency, he'll take care of you. and you can do the other gigs later.

_{[ being told in advance that he might get bit it kicked ... maybe torched .. doesn't seem to stop his enthusiasm. Karamatsu is the king of bad luck, at least this will make him famous like he is thinking that it will. ]}

You're the best.
You deserve to be number one karamatsu girl.

shit man you're gonna make me blush.

you should drop by the office when you're done, tell me about your rawhide adventure.

[If he doesn't have to come collect your broken body from the ranch. He's trying to be optimistic here.]

_{[ nobody ever wants to hang out with him.... ??????? ]}
You mean that?

I mean.. of course you do. Who wouldn't want to hang out with a celebrity?

[Chrissake. Why is he enabling your shit again?]

settle down hotshot.

do the job first, bask in fame later.

and you better not let this celebrity crap go to your head you hear?

[Since you're such a grounded and humble sort, otherwise.]

_{[ remember that Karamatsu Galaxy he goes off to sometimes? (all the time?) Can you expect something like this to not go to his head? All he's ever known is being somebody who couldn't achieve their dreams— somebody so worthless, he can't really fit into the world properly. He could be cast as an extra on a commercial about laxatives and be ecstatic about it, wondering where his trailer and make up artist are.

anyway, not making promises, Lloyd, so he completely ignores what he says. ]}

Should we partake of the nectar of the devil once more?
_{[ he means go drinking. ]}
Do you enjoy fishing? Ah, there are no pachinko parlors here.. otherwise i do think you'd fancy hearing the clatter of balls.
_{[ clatter of balls, though.. ]}

[How can Lloyd forget Karamatsu Galaxy? It's a pretty magical sort of place. Karamatsu's amazing capacity for denial is a glittering shield against the many pains and hardships his showbiz career is going to throw at him.

But the dude needs to come back to earth (or the underworld) every now and then, so he doesn't drift away completely.]

i'm always up for getting drinks, man. fishing, i don't know. the kinda fish they got here, we'll probably end up warming the belly of one of those creepy monsters than the other way around.

dunno what a pachinko is. is it something like pinball or pool?

[He's trying to think of things that have the CLATTER OF BALLS in them.]

Pinball would be correct. Back home it is illegal to gamble.. and so we have to get our money another way.. pachinko you win balls and exchange for tokens and prizes.. which you sell for money.
_{[ a pause and sudden realization hits. ]}

Gambling should be.. completely legal here, shouldn't it?
_{[ holy shit he can actually play poker? and all those other kinds of games that Vegas has that he has read about. ]}

i think i get what you mean. like an amusement arcade. i used to love those places.

course gambling is legal here. the fuck kinda self respecting hell wouldn't have gambling? why, you wanna play some chance games?

Could we? And not get in trouble with the police officers?

only if you play against them i guess, which i wouldn't do if i were you. i bet cops get real surly when they lose. might decide to get on your case just cause.

you know how to play any games?

I have learned to play.. because i dream of vegas! ^^
But I have never played before. Is it hard?

no man, it ain't hard. the casinos want money so the more idiots they got playing their games the better. playing is pretty easy. winning is a lot harder.

you dream of vegas, huh?

Yes, i dream of vegas! That is where all of the super models are, all of the super stars, all of where the American movies are from.. that's where all of the beautiful young women are.. where all of the dangerous people live.. where all of the money is..!!

If i could win big in las vegas, i would give my money to the maiden of my heart. ♥ I would be happily married and adored by people!!!
_{[ clearly he's seen way too many Western movies and has set high expectations for Vegas.. ]}

[Extremely high expectations, but Lloyd finds it pretty endearing. When he was younger, he kinda pictured Vegas similarly, like Disneyland for grown-ups, except so much fucking awesomer.

He had his dreams of winning big, too, and those got squashed pretty quickly, once he actually got there.]

actually man, hollywood is where the movies are from. it's a bit of a drive from vegas. you ain't wrong about the money and the hot ladies and the dangerous people. plenty of those to go around.

but the only big winners in vegas are the high rollers who're already swimming in cash when they come to play. everybody else is lucky if they get to keep their underwear. game's rigged, buddy.

_{[ oh.. this is horrible news.. you're breaking his heart.. ]}
They are rigged like.. UFO catcher machines??
Are you certain there is no luck involved?

[Sorry pal. Some dreams are better shattered. The alternative is your pockets suffering the same fate.]

there's luck involved but it's like the saying goes: the house always wins. not every time. they gotta lure the suckers in, let them thinks they can win big. but i been to vegas and i been to reno and i didn't meet a single person with a winning streak that lasted.

doesn't mean it ain't fun. when vegas shines, it really fucking shines.

Oh.. but if i learned to cheat..
_{[ hold it right there, slick.
where did this kind of devious behavior suddenly come from? especially from a guy who has already explained how guilty he feels sometimes. ]}

then you'll be real politely escorted out by a couple of casino goons and tossed in the trash.

if you're lucky they won't break your legs while at it.

[Is he being SUFFICIENTLY CLEAR that this is a bad idea, Karamatsu?]

text; un: agent2thestars

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